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This topic contains 11 replies, has 11 voices, and was last updated by  pringle 3 years, 10 months ago.

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  • #25888

    pringle
    Member

    Hi
    So I guess I’m writing for some advice as I cant seem to meet anyone I want to date. I’ll start by pointing out I don’t judge by looks.

    Brief history so far. I’m female, 27. I started to go out with my friends when I was 16 and continued to party hard for 6 years, nearly every night, was on a good wage & spent every penny, had alot of fun, one night stands but nothing serious.
    I got bored of the social scene when I was 22. I met a quiet country boy who was sweet, but had alot of drama going on with his ex and their child which I think is what attracted me to begin with, to ‘help him’, but ultimately is the reason why I ended it a year + half later.
    So here I am now, have been single again for over 4 years. The difference this time round, I’m not out with friends every night/ weekend as I just cant be bothered, I want country pubs now instead of night clubs! (I’m getting old ha ha)

    My mum is the youngest of 6 kids, she was the only one that married. The others were tall, good looking charismatic people but just never settled. My mum jokes I have the ‘bug’ too but I’m starting to worry I do!
    I’ve only had one boyfriend in life so far and I only got with him cause I was bored of single life. Go figure.

    So, I am struggling to meet a guy I actually like. Ive been on a string of dates over the last year and met all sorts, deep thinkers, good lookers, perfect gents, rich men, rude men, the lot! None have appealed to me.
    I think my problem is that I’m looking for a certain sense of humor. Ive grown up around very funny men in my family, and I think this has set a goal post for my future man. I love a guy that makes me laugh it makes me feel at ease and is the only attraction I’m open to.
    I’ve only met TWO men in life so far that have had realy cracking sense of humors and subsequently are the only 2 men I’ve had deep feelings for and neither I’ve had relationships with unfortunately. One was a good friend that I grew feelings for, never had the guts to tell him, he later married and we don’t speak anymore. The other was an old flame from many years ago that had the sense of humor I’m after. Hes now engaged although still contacts me asking to meet which I find really hard to resist as I love his company, we do meet now and then but cant keep our hands off each other.

    I’m often told I’m too picky. So I guess my question is, should I just settle with someone who is ‘nice enough’? Ive never been in a rush to get with someone and I’m not now, but I am 27, and I don’t really want to be single for another 4 years. I’m looking for someone I have a spark with, is this really important? Ive always felt it is, but starting to think maybe its not..

    Any advice would be appreciated!

    #40309

    kappa845
    Member

    Hi Pringle, interesting story you have there. 🙂
    To answer by points:

    1. I do not think you’re too picky, you are just trying to find your ideal partner with whom to feel comfortable with.

    2. If you will end up with a “nice guy” it won’t last long, for sure. You will get bored and in the end you’ll break up. 100%! 😀

    3. For God sake, you are 27! You should keep having fun (no night clubs though! 🙂 ), do what you like, stop searching for him and allow faith to come into play.

    4. There is a possibility to get bored with all men spending more than a few months with, why can’t you deal with that? Should we all go with the same pattern “get married, have kids, work work work age age age”? 🙂

    #40339

    admin
    Keymaster
    pringle;4159 wrote:

    Hi
    So I guess I’m writing for some advice as I cant seem to meet anyone I want to date. I’ll start by pointing out I don’t judge by looks.

    Brief history so far. I’m female, 27. I started to go out with my friends when I was 16 and continued to party hard for 6 years, nearly every night, was on a good wage & spent every penny, had alot of fun, one night stands but nothing serious.
    I got bored of the social scene when I was 22. I met a quiet country boy who was sweet, but had alot of drama going on with his ex and their child which I think is what attracted me to begin with, to ‘help him’, but ultimately is the reason why I ended it a year + half later.
    So here I am now, have been single again for over 4 years. The difference this time round, I’m not out with friends every night/ weekend as I just cant be bothered, I want country pubs now instead of night clubs! (I’m getting old ha ha)

    My mum is the youngest of 6 kids, she was the only one that married. The others were tall, good looking charismatic people but just never settled. My mum jokes I have the ‘bug’ too but I’m starting to worry I do!
    I’ve only had one boyfriend in life so far and I only got with him cause I was bored of single life. Go figure.

    So, I am struggling to meet a guy I actually like. Ive been on a string of dates over the last year and met all sorts, deep thinkers, good lookers, perfect gents, rich men, rude men, the lot! None have appealed to me.
    I think my problem is that I’m looking for a certain sense of humor. Ive grown up around very funny men in my family, and I think this has set a goal post for my future man. I love a guy that makes me laugh it makes me feel at ease and is the only attraction I’m open to.
    I’ve only met TWO men in life so far that have had realy cracking sense of humors and subsequently are the only 2 men I’ve had deep feelings for and neither I’ve had relationships with unfortunately. One was a good friend that I grew feelings for, never had the guts to tell him, he later married and we don’t speak anymore. The other was an old flame from many years ago that had the sense of humor I’m after. Hes now engaged although still contacts me asking to meet which I find really hard to resist as I love his company, we do meet now and then but cant keep our hands off each other.

    I’m often told I’m too picky. So I guess my question is, should I just settle with someone who is ‘nice enough’? Ive never been in a rush to get with someone and I’m not now, but I am 27, and I don’t really want to be single for another 4 years. I’m looking for someone I have a spark with, is this really important? Ive always felt it is, but starting to think maybe its not..

    Any advice would be appreciated!

    Hey! Why are you so desperate if you are single? After all , marriage is not the only aim in a women’s life.

    I am not saying that there is no need to marry. But I think you will find your partner when your time will come.

    And believe me if you are going on searching and searching, you won’t find him. Have faith in God and he will help you out.

    #40340

    helperbee
    Member

    To settle for someone and live without the spark? Or to carry on being single, lonely, and looking for your perfect man? Firstly, don’t settle because you will regret it at some point in the future. Learn to be happy on your own, keep on meeting men – as many as you can. You are only young and eventually you will meet your man. Only if you have settled for someone else in the meantime, you will not be free to be with him. Fulfilment is not about having a man in your life. Seek fulfilment first and the relationship will follow.

    #40424

    Humour is a massive turn on for women from my experience.

    #40425

    p.s. Why not post a pic here?

    #40567

    Anonymous

    Are you really looking for a partner? Does it need to be a funny guy? I mean how about the others? Don’t you feel something for them even if they don’t have the kind of sense of humor that you want? It’s really hard to find one especially when you set standards, though I think every woman do really like a funny guy 🙂

    #40574

    Delight
    Member

    If your clear about the types of qualities that you want in a man, write them down. Once you are clear about what it is you’re are actually looking for, start to think about what are qualities you’re ideal man would want in their partner …. do you think you possess these qualities?

    Sometimes we think that we want something, but we are not ready, or at the right point in our life to attract the right person. Be clear about want you want, but don’t dwell on it constantly or let it consume you.

    Continue to enjoy your life and have fun, and trust that you will meet your perfect match when the time is right.

    #40624

    Jooly Elan
    Member

    It is really very interesting the wide area of know about it

    #40629

    welovedates
    Member

    Girl, 27 is not old! There is no need to settle down right now if you haven’t met the right person. I know it’s overwhelming sometimes but take the pressure off yourself and enjoy this time of your life.

    #40975

    kathy68
    Member

    hi ive got a group on facebook if any one is interested its called lucky in love its for people who have not had much luck in dating either on datin sites or datin normally you can share your experiences either good or bad or even funny, its for men and women you can chat in general aswell it is a friendly group so you will be made welcome it is a closed group so people feel at ease, i do have 10 members but would like more the pic for the group is a green apple, i do have a page on facebook as well called lookin for love where you can share your comments i have 10 likes and would like more the pic for that is a orange flower my group is on there to if you would like to know more then please send me a message thankyou

    #41056

    rachelljhall
    Member

    Yes you are still younger 27 is not age of marriage may be you look for some good man around you. But about marriage personally i am not agree with you. Find some guy who have good sense of humor and if you like him then first go for casual relationship and after that you both really want to marry each other then who else going to stop you.

    Best of luck girl

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